I have realized that when your ill husband is on the other side of the country without you, you can do either one of two things:
1.) Worry every second you are without him because you aren't there to take care of him
or...
2.) Let God care for your husband.
I would be lying if I told you answer two has been my choice of action. In fact, I would be lying to you if I told you answer two has been my answer some of the time. There are many times I wish I could pack up and leave KC behind to take care of my husband. It's hard to hear him so fatigued and hurting over the phone and knowing that as his wife, if I were there, I could at least cook him a meal and let him rest.
So yes, it's SUPER frustrating wanting to fulfill my God given calling as Kevin's wife to be his help-meet, and in the same breath...not being able. However, God has been so graciously showing me that Kevin is His child, and He is most adequate to care for Him. IN FACT, God didn't choose me to be Kevin's wife because He needed someone to take care of his child; God simply blessed me with the gift of being Kevin's help-meet. What a privilege!
God has been using many other people to care for my husband; from his sweet grandmother giving him a place to stay while he heals, to the kind-hearted mother of another Lyme patient surprising my husband with Paleo pancakes to satisfy his hunger. If I could begin to write to you all the things God as done for us in the past five weeks of Kevin's treatment, it would take hours. Our stories are countless and in fact, miraculous.
The best way a wife could care for her husband who is miles away is this; point him to God. because in the end, God's is sovereign. Our lives are in His hands. Before the foundation of the world, He had written our story and knew the people He was going to put into our lives to care for us along the way. Our gracious and merciful God is in control. So our prayer is this, “I believe; help my unbelief!”
